~The Speth Family~: A good book (so far...)

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

A good book (so far...)

For Mother's Day I received a book called A Mother's Book of Secrets. At first I thought it was funny that I was getting a book about how to be a better mother, and while this book could very well provide insights that make me a better mother, I just discovered that it was written with the intent to share ways that other mothers have found to enjoy motherhood despite its crazy, messy, unpredictable nature. Funny how your understanding changes once you actually start reading the book :)

I decided that if anyone is actually interested enough in me and my little family to read my rantings, this would be a good place to share what I am learning. The chapters are pretty short, which is nice because I don't have a lot of free time so I can read them here and there as I make time (or decide to ignore my children for ten minutes)

Unfortunately that is exactly the point the first chapter talks about, "I did not live in the moment enough...I wish I could remember what we ate, what we talked about, how they sounded, how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less." Kylie always asks me about cute things she used to say when she was little and I can't remember a lot of what her baby talk sounded like.. sad!

"One day I just slowed down...Sometimes success is when we DON'T get through the to-do list but instead stop long enough to notice the little things. To savor moments. Not only to notice the delight in our children's eyes, but to help CREATE that delight...

...But being there isn't about money or even about staying home full-time. Its about an emotional and spiritual shift, of succumbing to Being Where You Are When You Are, and Being There as much as possible...

...Its about being attuned enough to notice when your kid's eyes shine so you can make your eyes shine back"

"The joy I let myself feel while I'm in the moment with my kids will not fade with the years like the pictures and the memories; it will become part of me. It will become part of my children."

So I guess that is the goal - to get past being tired, or frustrated because the house is dirty or having a million things to accomplish in a short amount of time and really look at my children and enjoy every crazy, dirty, hyper, moody, messy moment with them. To notice when my children need the attention only a parent can give them. To compliment them when they deserve it and build their self esteem. To figure out why "children are an heritage of the Lord". If nothing else, this past year I have learned that having children is a sacred privilege. He trusts us with the care of these little spirits and trusts that when we are able to be with them, we will be WITH them - make them feel important and loved and teach them how to be happy and how to return to the Celestial kingdom.

Wow - I have a lot of work to do!

2 comments:

Tyler & LauraMay 21, 2009 at 12:37 PM
I LOVED THAT BOOK, TOO! I really need to re-read it and take some notes. It was excellent and I loved all of the advice and suggestions. It also kind of made me depressed, too, because I realized that I don't live enough "in the moment" either. It's insane to me that Jack is two years old when I remember bringing him home from the hospital. One day we will be taking him to the MTC and I want to say that I ENJOYED him while he was little. I want to remember his jabbers, his moods, his laugh, his little-ness. I am so with you on this! What a good book.
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HeidiMay 21, 2009 at 2:30 PM
Oh wow, what wonderful thoughts and comments, Suzi! Thank youfor the great encouragement to find, make and enjoy those daily mother moments. I want to enjoy it all. Thanks to blogging I guess, it helps us capture some of those times so we can remember later. Great ideas and thanks again for sharing your thots!
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