Friday, September 10, 2010

Dear Lucas,

I love you, and I have actually enjoyed having you in the house with us.  Unfortunately, if this situation is to remain pleasant for the both of us, a couple of adjustments on your part will need to be made.

First, my children are not popsicles.  Lick and lick as you will, but they WILL NOT dissolve.  I know Ammon is a little tricky because he smells like a Nilla wafer, but in actuality he is not edible.

Second, I do not want to wear your slobber all day.  I get enough of that from Ammon so I'm good.  Thanks anyway.

Third, I LOVE the way you immediately return to the back door after eating or doing your "business", but if I am standing there with the tennis ball or big rubber tire thingy its ok to play for a bit.  I promise to let you back in the house when we're done.

Fourth, you have lost your manners a few times and I feel so inclined to remind you of a few rules. No eating the cat food, no peeking in the pantry in search of a yummy treat, and absolutely no looking in the sink for leftovers.

And that's not all.  John has a few suggestions as well..

Fifth, I appreciate your excitement and desire to always be at my side but I'd appreciate it if you'd give me a little more space. It could be very dangerous for both of us if I were to trip and fall.

Sixth, Attaya's got to go. Could you please do your part in keeping her out of the house? (Don't tell Suzi)

Finally, your tail is a weapon and you need to control it. It could be a fierce blow and if connected with the right kid(s) at the right angle it could knock them to Timbuctu. 

Well that about covers it.  I would be happy to hear your concerns as well, but you can't talk. Remember, we love you and we're happy to have you in our family!

Love,
John and Suzi

No comments:

Post a Comment